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Politics & Government

Evangelist Claims Homosexual Lobby Stole Marriage and the Rainbow

A satirical look at current events!

Evangelist Claims Homosexual Lobby Stole Marriage and the Rainbow: Walker Weldon of the American Family Association, is accusing the “homosexual lobby” of not only stealing marriage, but also stealing the rainbow, both of which are God-created and don’t belong to them.

Wow, that’s pretty serious. You can go to prism for stealing a rainbow. They ought to be locked up with all the other violet criminals and the sentence should be increased with every refraction. And the really sad thing is, God can’t even sue to get the rainbows back, because Hell has all the lawyers. To make matters worse, the fact that the Democrats are using the color blue to symbolize their party, means the LGBT community and Obama apparently have also stolen the sky.

All I can say is, its lucky that someone has finally made “light” of this rainbow theft! It gives us a ray of hope. After all, who could’ve envisioned a world where, every time an innocent child looks up at the sky and sees a rainbow, they’re gonna turn gay? Its almost like “and God said let there be light, and he saw that it was simply fabulous.” That’s almost enough to make any self-respecting homophobe turn green with envy.

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Perhaps its time to once again fill the skies with a clear message to these dastardly rainbow thieves - “Surrender Dorothy!”

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