Life Coaching with Horses: Diane Hunter

Editor's note: The weekend workshop at Chaparral Ranch is full, but for future sessions, email diane@afterautism.com.

A career-driven woman in high-tech, Diane Hunter was thrown a loop when she gave birth to her first child who showed signs of autism at an early age.  

A self-described "recovering controlaholic," the Los Gatos resident had to learn to parent the hard way–without any words. Her son is unable to speak.

However, a transformative experience with a horse trained her mind and gave her the tools to work with both of her children (her second child does not have autism), using non-verbal leadership skills. 

She attended her first horse workshop created by Martha Beck and Koelle Simpson in 2009. It changed her life and helped her create a more peaceful family environment.  The results from her experience motivated her to train with both Martha and Koelle to become a certified Mind-Body and Equus Coach. 

This weekend, Hunter leads her own equus (horse) workshop at Chaparral Ranch in Milpitas. Other times, you'll find her at Los Gatos Farms, and Portola Valley's Webb Ranch. Her day job as a Mind-Body Coach does not necessarily mean she works with horses all the time, but she would do it every day if given the choice, she said.

She works with individuals who want to develop leadership skills and build trust in their relationships. Her work is especially effective for parents and she loves working with parents of children with autism, she said.

"Your children are incredibly sensitive to those non-verbal cues," said Hunter, who now understands that when she felt stressed, her children would pick up on it and react in a negative way. 

Why horses?

Being alone with a trained horse in a ring can give clients instant feedback. For Hunter's equus coaching practice, one session with a horse is as powerful as ten coaching sessions (in person or on the phone). Her focus with the horses is to show people how to access their own leadership power without saying a word.

One Saturday, Amrit Sandhu from Turlock was taking in a day-long session at Chaparral Ranch. She doesn't have autistic children, but was working on her leadership skills.

She was inside the ring with a horse that seemed somewhat confused as to which way to go. She wasn't riding the horse, but simply trying to tune into the subtle non-verbal feedback. (See the videos on right with Hunter demonstrating the technique.)

"I was realizing some patterns I wasn't aware of," she said.

"You think you're telling him to go back and you're not actually projecting that with how you're moving," she said. 

"What feedback are you getting from your horse," called out Hunter to Sandhu from outside the ring. "Reinforce the behavior that you want. If the pattern is not working, try something different," she said.

With her children, Hunter has learned to reinforce positive behavior, ignore negative behavior, and teach them how she wants to be treated, with love and motivation.

"I no longer tell my children what they should or should not do," she said.  “I lead by example and teach them how to treat me.  I awaken their natural motivation to connect.”

She teaches her clients how to connect with their body and lead from their inner core–and get out of their heads. This is a concept referred to in yoga and other practices that incorporate holistic schools of thought.

Learning new skills to work with children

Mardi Wooster from San Jose said coaching with a horse is a different way to think about therapy. She is a special ed teacher and mother of two special needs kids, one which had a speech delay. 

"At that time, he had no language," she said. "He would leave you and tune out."

She decided to take a workshop course with Hunter at Los Gatos Farms. At the workshop she was in tears for three days, she said.

"I can talk the talk and sound one way," said Wooster. But "when you're trying to get in sync with the horse…you can't hide."  

"You quickly realize the more you react and sort of panic ... the more the horse doesn't respond," she said.

So she's learned in difficult moments to shift, breathe and relax, she said.

Doing the exercise, shoulder to shoulder with the horse, not using hands, force, or tugging can be a physical experience in itself, she said.

"Your whole body was changing," she said. "I felt it in the core of my being."

Hunter says, “The work with horses awakened a new awareness for me and I now live life in a place of peace and ease.” 

"It completely changed my family dynamic," she said. "It's much calmer and my son’s healing has accelerated."

To learn more about Diane's life coaching, visit www.afterautism.com. You can sign up for her monthly newsletter and join in on her monthly call.