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Health & Fitness

Monica Lewinsky Writing Book

A satirical look at current events!

Monica Lewinsky Writing Book:  The New York Post reports that Monica Lewinsky, the woman at the center of the former President Clinton’s impeachment scandal, has been shopping around a top-secret book.  Those who’ve seen her manuscript say that now we know that even her writing sucks.

Tupac Hologram Company Broke:  The company that made the famous Tupac hologram has filed for bankruptcy.  Turns out that the company’s financial situation was nothing but an illusion.

Pepsi President Resigns:  John Compton, the president of Pepsi, has announced that he is leaving the company immediately after less than a year on the job.  Rumor has it that he had over a $100-a-day Coke habit.

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Sally Struthers Busted for DUI:  Sally Struthers, known for her role on the ground-breaking sitcom All in the Family as well as her pleas for the Christian Children’s Fund, has been arrested for DUI in Maine.  And for about 70 cents a day, you can help defray the cost of Sally’s DUI legal defense.

Find out what's happening in Pacific Palisadesfor free with the latest updates from Patch.

Fish Good for Eyesight:  New research suggests that women who consume fish regularly have a lower risk of developing age-related macular degeneration.  In contrast, women who frequently who eat at McDonald’s are more likely to develop Big Mac-ular Degeneration.

Passenger Arrested After Watching Porn on Flight:  A Nevada passenger has been arrested at Denver International Airport after he was caught by another passenger touching himself while viewing pornography in-flight.  While some passengers were offended, others described the scene as very touching.

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Marijuana Use and Testicular Cancer:  According to a U.S. study, young men who had smoked marijuana recreationally were twice as likely to be diagnosed with testicular cancer than men who have never used marijuana.  And perhaps the saddest part is - even if they want to quit smoking pot - they may no longer have the cojones to do it. 

Kardashian 9/11 Moment:  Unlike rival networks, NBC's Today show decided to skip the commemoration for 9/11, choosing instead to air a segment with Kardashian family matriarch Kris Jenner talking about her breast augmentation.  That makes sense, because when you think about it, both could be considered horrible disasters.

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