GF Attitude: Half the Battle

When I tell people that Ruthie has celiac, I am often met with "The Face"; a strained look of pity that is quickly covered up with an awkward grin of support or a stammer as people try to seek words of comfort.  "The Face" is usually followed by "Oh, that is so hard!" or "Poor Ruthie!  Poor you!  Your whole family must have a terrible time with this!"

Folks, I am here to tell you today and every day, that this diagnosis is a gift. The gluten-free diet has completely changed our child.  She is no longer in chronic pain.  She is growing and thriving. She is more alert and less foggy-headed.  She enjoys enjoys a nutritionally sound diet because, truth be told, there is more that she can eat than she cannot.  And what she cannot eat, she is better off avoiding for a host of reasons, not all related to celiac.

These were the precise sentiments we have drilled into Ruthie since the day her diagnosis was official.  As a firm believer in "the message is everything," and "what you don't say is as important as what you reveal," I proceeded to tell Ruthie how fortunate she was to have a answers to why her belly hurt so much.  I explained that there are certain "red light" foods that she would need to learn to avoid, but that there were many more "green light" foods that she could have instead.  I kept a positive attitude about it all, and truthfully, it wasn't an act.  I was RELIEVED that she could manage this allergy solely through dietary changes, and I made it my mission to help her understand that these changes were a good thing and pretty soon, it would all be second nature.

The other philosophy we hold and have imparted to Ruthie is that her allergy is HER responsibility, and we have taught her how to accept that responsibility.  If she is going to a birthday party, we find out ahead of time what is being served and we bring our own pizza and/or cupcakes.  We keep a stash of GF foods at the houses where she spends a lot of time, and we try to keep a small stash in our car should we find ourselves at an impromptu playdate where snacks are served.  In her classroom at school, her teacher has a small selection of GF treats that she can have for in-class birthday celebrations or other special occasions.  Adapting our lifestyle this way enables Ruthie to participate in day-to-day activities as seamlessly as possible.

Finally, we teach Ruthie gratitude.  One of the by-products of our approach to Ruthie's celiac is that very often we are shown enormous kindness by others.  The birthday party where the mom found a bunch of GF products for Ruthie to enjoy instead of cake.  The classroom mom who called me to coordinate food for the in-class Christmas/Hanukkah party.  The friend who gave us an entire basket of GF goodies she won at a raffle.  Each and every time someone extends a kindness, I make sure Ruthie thanks them personally.  

Three years later, I still encounter "The Face," but not as often.  Or maybe it just seems that way because our GF Attitude is second nature, proof that it is the gift that keeps on giving.