Oh the humanity!
If you know me at all then you know for a fact that if I like an idea I say yes, jump in with both feet and never look back - this is one of those instances.
My friend (or as I've taken to calling her, my sistah from another mistah) Ann Marie from www.StupidDumbBreastCancer.com asked me to join her on a blog tour. I said yes with a capital Y-E-S. Did I think about how I was going to get this done in a week? Ummmm, NO! Did I think about my work schedule or my hellacious commute? Nuh-uh! I just loved the idea of being part of a web to bring other bloggers together - so here I am, jumping right on in!
Funny thing is, I've only really been blogging for about a year, and up until recently I was pretty sure the only person reading my blog was my mom.
My story begins in May 2007, smack in the middle of my life. I was a thirty-eight year old mom of two young boys, aged eleven and nine. I worked in the design offices of an internationally known fashion company. I had a husband, an SUV, a big dog, and a home not too far from the beach. I had a family, good friends, and too many obligations. I had plenty of joy, pain, laughter, and frustrations in every area of my life, as do most married working mothers. My life was complex. My cups were full. Then I found a lump in my right breast. Shortly thereafter came the diagnosis that would forever change my life.
Breast cancer, stage IIA.
About two weeks later there I was, wandering aimlessly through the medical section of my local Barnes and Noble trying desperately to find a book that would make sense of all, give me a laugh and help me feel a little less alone. I got nothing. Zip. Zero. Nada. All the books I picked up either congratulated me on my cancer diagnosis (seriously?) or informed me that this would be an ideal time to slow down and retire (I'm sorry but I'm not familiar with either of those terms). I was told to embrace my cancer (ew!) and start living a life filled with purpose (I don't even know what that means. Purpose? I'm raising two human beings, keeping a roof over our heads and food on the table. I have a purpose thank you very much). I was so frustrated. Where was the book that said straight up having cancer sucks? Where was the book that was going to tell me I would be okay, even if I wasn't okay? Where was the book that was going to encourage me to laugh at my Franken-boobs? Well, it certainly was not on those shelves at B&N but it was inside of me. As I navigated the choppy waters of breast cancer, bra askew, snark firmly in place, I began to keep a journal which then became the book Does This Outfit Make Me Look Bald? How A Fashionista Fought Breast Cancer With Style.
My book release coincided with my five year cancerversary. I was so excited. I was doing a ton of local press and book signings in and around the Jersey Shore area and most importantly, I was making a difference and helping other young women through their diagnosis. But ... six months later I found out that I had breast cancer again, because having cancer once just wasn't enough fun.
That's when I began the mini-blogs on my Facebook fan page for my book called Confessions From The Chemo Chair and Chemo Girls Words Of Wisdom. I was then asked by my local online paper to begin a blog there and Beating Cancer With Style - The Fashionista Fights On! was born.
So who do I read? Below I've listed three bloggers that make my life more bearable, that remind me to laugh, and just inspired the hell out of me. I encourage you to click the links and learn more about these fantastic women changing the world one opinion at a time.
1. Adrienn Hunt http://thisuncomplicatedjourney.blogspot.com She writes about real every day life - dripping with sarcasm and laced with profanity. Which I just LOVE! She is also part of the Moms Who Write and Blog Facebook page which sometimes gives me a little shout out and keeps me smiling.
2. Courtney Fitzgerald http://oursmallmoments.com She blogs about the every day challenges of being a mom, having a child on the autism spectrum, and the loss of her husband to a rare form of cancer. Amazing, inspiring and resilient.
3. Jen Mann http://www.peopleiwanttopunchinthethroat.com She is hysterically funny, honest, and calls it as she sees it. No BS. She's also written some pretty hilarious books about motherhood and marriage. Check her out.
And now for the deets ... my Q & A section.
What are you working on? I'm working on two books, one is fictional chick-lit, the protagonist having a back story of being a young breast cancer survivor. The other is a small coping manual compiling my blogs and interspersed with my Confessions From The Chemo Chair and Chemo Girls Words Of Wisdom postings. I also just found out that an article I submitted to a travel magazine will be published - so that is super exciting! I'm also focusing on becoming more ingrained in my breast cancer community. I have met some of the most amazing women through this illness and I want to be there cheering them on, empowering them, and helping them through the rough patches. I always say, it's the best club I never wanted to join. I continue to speak at health fairs and cancer support groups, which I love! I'm writing two blogs a month and constantly submitting articles to magazines and essay contests. It took the stupid cancer to find (and free) my voice. I'm also getting my oldest son ready to go off to college so my writing keeps me from breaking down into the ugly cry I've become prone to doing quite frequently now.
How does my work differ from others of its genre? Well, since I primarily focus my writing on coping with a life changing illness (you know that old advice - write what you know) I also always try to find the humorous angle in any given circumstance. I can't be all, "Wah, I have cancer, wah, wah, wah." No one wants to read that. Life is serious enough. We all have our battles to fight and mountains to climb, I just prefer to fight and climb with a smile and a pair of stilettos. You have to laugh at the absurdity of any given situation and you might as well look good doing it.
Why do I write what I do? It depends on where my head is at. Sometimes I am writing to help process feelings or emotions that I am struggling with and other times it is because I have to get something off my chest (ahhh, too easy but I went there anyway). I voice my opinion on whatever the latest 'breaking news on cancer' articles seem to be spouting. I am inclined to the occasional foul-mouthed rant when all is not right in my little world, and other times I write about the sistah-hood of survivorship.
How does my writing process work? I listen to a lot of music and often I'll hear a lyric that resonates with me and I'll use that as a jumping off point. I'm a frustrated rock star, meaning that I should have been the lead singer in a band but I am completely tone deaf and have no musical ability whatsoever. I'm one a hell of an air-drummer though and can rock out in the car at a red light like nobody's business. I tend to write mostly at night (thanks insomnia - it's a cancer thing) when everyone else is asleep and typically once I start I can't stop; what I begin at night I'll continue write on the train while I'm commuting or if i'm really lucky, at the beach on a nice sunny day.
Here are the links to all things me, check 'em out -
My Fanpage - because us bloggers only get paid in 'likes':
www.facebook.com/DoesThisOutfitMakeMeLookBald?
Website - for all things BALD:
www.TheFashionistaFights.com
Follow the Fashionista Blog - no really, you can sign up and everything:
http://marlboro-coltsneck.patch.com/blogs/jennifer-pellechio-lukowiaks-blog
My blog for Cure Diva - my most favorite website:
http://www.curediva.com/blog/author/Jennifer+Pellechio-Lukowiak/
My guest blog for the Victorious Val website - This girl gives more support than your best bra:
http://thebreastcancercrusaders.com/
My Fight Like A Girl Story - because most of us are not pirouetting through life:
http://www.fightlikeagirlclub.com/2014/05/jenns-fight-like-a-girl-story-the-fashionista-fights-breas...
My article for Coping Magazine - a great resource for us all in the fight:
http://copingmag.com/cwc/index.php/cancerType/cancerType_survivor_article/the_fashionista_fights_aga...
