Hardly Beloved

It would be distinctly untrue to say that she was beloved by all women.  She hardly fell into the realm of a Jackie Onassis or Mother Theresa and certainly, not Joan of Arc.  Yet when the news broke, we all knew who she was.

And perhaps that in itself would have been gratifying to Joan Rivers.  The mere fact that she had become a household name would have made her smile.  Or so, I believe.

Her wit was caustic; often, objectionable, and never gracious.  There were moments when many of us watching her on our TV screens were glad we were alone, more than a bit embarrassed to find ourselves smiling at her ribald humor.

And for most of my generation, the excessive plastic surgery was hard to comprehend.  However, in the silence of many moments gazing in a mirror, haven’t all of us just wondered what a bit of Botox might have accomplished?  She certainly was a pioneer in the acceptance of myriad plastic surgery episodes.  Even now as I cringe at the prospect of a routine injection for a dental procedure, I am amazed at her courage in maintaining and improving her appearance.  Would I have done it given the opportunity?  Of course not, nor would most of my friends.  Yet I had to admire her personal courage in undergoing the numerous elective medical techniques that certainly kept her young and vibrant in appearance.

I think while I rarely agreed with her political or personal critiques, I found her resilience in going forward in life, not denying the onset of years, but functioning at full speed as long as she could, a bit inspirational.  In a strange way, she reminded me of the pioneer women who despite incredible hardships labored forward.

Her life while filled with a glamorous wardrobe and a luxurious lifestyle, along with more wealth than most of us can estimate, wasn’t really easy.  Standing nightly in different locales facing an unknown audience had to be incredibly challenging.  Perhaps she did it for her own personal reasons, it doesn’t matter.  It took courage.  And I guess that’s really what I admire.

Yes, sometimes she made me laugh; more often, I cringed.  I loved to see how she dressed, and I totally envied her ability to walk in stiletto heels at 81.  Perhaps I also secretly wanted to have a feather boa.

Recently, I empathized when she chose to move closer to her only child.  Admitting you need to be closer to family is never easy regardless of your role in life.

Most of all though, I was impressed with her decision not to relinquish performing when she could easily have done so.  I think that most women of our generation, who watched her either on QVC selling her jewelry or on The Fashion Police, always felt just a little bit younger because she always looked fabulous.

I also believe that all of us who watched her spasmodically throughout her lengthy career also agree today that we hope Joan Rivers’ final appearance is a brilliant success.