Mom, Anna King Donlon, had two favorite phrases sprinkled into her voluminous vocabulary.
One, of course, was “Poor Souls.” They were neighbors in financial need and/or crippled with alcohol or health issues. It also included any young women without Mothers, or troubled she encountered during life. Mom believed firmly she was there to help, either with a pot of soup, ham sandwich or a folded bill. And always with a welcome listen to “Your troubles.”
The other phrase (although only used once to the best of my memory,) was “A Living Saint,” and that was only applicable to Aunt Lizzie Hall, my Dad’s sister,.
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However, this week I introduced that phrase into my own memory bank when Joan Dankowski boarded the ferry on November.6, a week after All Saints Day.
Joan and I were strangers when we met and only introduced upon learning our youngest children had met, fallen in love, and were soon to marry.
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We lived in neighboring villages, but different Parishes, and traveled on different LIRR routes. However, as time inevitably flew by, our paths frequently intertwined with Christmas gift cards to Palmer’s and Outback. Soon we became friends. In that interim Joan had lost her beloved Bill, and my own Anam Cara had also taken his final trip.
Joan and I shared more than our children’s growing family. We shared the experience of caring for a beloved soul mate throughout a long illness. However, Joan’s care for Bill lasted far longer than mine, and she became an inspiration years later when Art, my husband, fell ill.
Eventually, we both relocated, reluctantly but with the confidence of our belief system. Possibly that was the real road to our friendship. Joan and I found solace, comfort and hope in our faith.
And I know how very appropriate it was that God brought his faithful daughter, Joan Dankowski. home in November, the month when both of us observed the feast of All Saints.
Because to quote my Mom, Joan Dankowski was (not unlike so many other unrecognized fellow pilgrims) truly “A Living Saint,” and will be missed by all who knew her.
