A Quieter

It’s hard to admit, but I must.

I do miss TV newscasts, all the friendly faces flashing across the screen, and yes, the updated information and occasional sparks of ironic humor,

In the dark days after my husband departed for another world, I slowly began to watch daily newscasts more and more.

Whenever I turned the TV set on, the friendly voices seemed to wash away the clinging silence in the suddenly empty home we once shared.

I choose not to believe I became addicted, but prefer to recall there were certain moments of my suddenly solitary life I shared only with my TV set, i.e., cloudy Tuesday mornings after draining a second cup of black coffee and always, always on Sunday afternoons when bbq chicken dinners no longer had any appeal.

I would also like to think watching Television was never very important in my new life, but I know favorite commentators appeared more and more on my daily calendar

When I relocated and became obliged to make new accommodations for many things, including socially, national TV newscasts were included increasingly on my schedule.

Of course, that has ended, not only for me, but for many others.

Sometimes at noon as I nibble on a grilled cheese sandwich and sip a glass of cold milk, I attempt a reconciliation,

Then the doom, gloom and brutal reality that flickers from the screen into my peaceful emvironment forces me to grab the remote and once more retreat into quiet contemplation,

Occasionally relaxing in my apartment before a 6 pm dinner scheduled with a friend, I timidly try again.

But to no avail, the evening agenda presents only more bad news from both sides of the political aisle and the world in general.

And yet, I do so wish it were different.

I am not, in the words of the great songwriter, Oscar Hammerstein, “A Cockeyed Optimist,” but life always has joy if we look closely.

Possibly if one or all of the numerous outlets reinserted just a sliver of optimism. I could reestablish our once firm relationship.

Or has the media world completely abandoned that possibility?

I do know my limited world is decidedly quieter, and I confess I miss the nightly newscast, and luncheon updates on TV.

Yet I am aware if I follow my wellness guru’s advice to avoid negativity, I must abstain from all contact until a ray of sunlight infiltrates the bleak darkness.

Hopefully, in time to come, that will happen,.

Until then my world will remain decidedly quieter without the once welcome presence of television news.