Walk Of Love: Community Rallies For Life-Changing Cancer Research

NORTH FORK, NY — Their faces may have been covered with masks but the love was shining from their eyes.

Those who gathered Saturday for the "Trotting for Trisha" walk, organized to raise funds for the American Cancer Society — in honor of Mattituck resident Trisha Poole, who was diagnosed in January with breast cancer — came together at the North Fork Roadhouse to support a friend and show solidarity for others waging the war.

It was a day filled not just with resolve and determination, but also to reunite with friends after months in quarantine, to share the gift of a smile and the sound of laughter.

Poole said she wanted to thank Kim Kerrigan-Czujko for organizing the walk, as well as everyone that registered to participate and everyone that donated.

"I am incredibly grateful for the outpouring of support to me and my husband and can’t say thank you enough," she said.

Reflecting on the past months, Poole added: "Being diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer changed every aspect of my life and it’s been hard to go through this. It was a real boost to see so many friends and I felt surrounded by love and positive energy — that in itself is very healing."

And, she said, she was deeply touched when the group all took a moment and prayed.

"My faith is a huge part of who I am," Poole said. "My inner strength comes from God, as well as from the support and prayers of family and friends. And, of course, from my friend Keri Stromksi, who is my —as well as so many others— inspiration of hope, faith, strength and positivity. It meant so much to me that she was there to support me."

Stromski was diagnosed with with Stage 4 breast cancer in 2016.

When Poole and Stromski were in a college sorority years ago, their days were filled with fun, music and memories. Years later, they reconnected — not knowing at the time that they'd one day share a battle with breast cancer and find inspiration and hope in their lifetime friendship.

And the chain of love continued at Saturday's event: Stromski announced that The North Fork Roadhouse is selling "NOFO ROHO" pink lemonade and donating a portion of the proceeds to her oncologist Dr. Alison Stopeck at Stony Brook University Hospital.

"Brian and Keith Lewin, two of the owners, love to help the community and give back any way they can," Stromski said. "They hosted the walk for Trisha Poole and having known my husband and myself and my efforts to raise funds for my oncologist Dr. Stopeck, decided they wanted to help Stage 4 patients by donating directly to research."

Organizer Kerrigan-Czujko spoke about the event: "It turned out to be a beautiful day with an overwhelming amount of love and support for Trisha," she said. The 'Trotting For Trisha' team has currently raised over $10,000."

People can absolutely still donate to the team by using the link here, she said. "The money raised from the American Cancer Society’s 'Making Strides Against Breast Cancer' events provides funding for innovative breast cancer research, early detection and prevention messaging and patient support services."

For additional information on the American Cancer Society, call 1-800-227-2345 or click here.

"Stage 4 needs more"

Since Stromski was diagnosed four years ago with Stage 4 metastic breast cancer, she has spoken honestly about the experience and the dire need for funding for Stage 4 research — not T-shirts that say "Save the Ta-Tas" or pink trinkets.

Metastatic cancer means the cancer has spread beyond the breast and lymph nodes to other organs in the body.

In January, Poole was diagnosed with Stage 3 triple negative breast cancer and has since undergone chemotherapy, surgery and 25 rounds of radiation.

The North Fork community rallied to help.

Hearing of Poole's story, Darla Doorhy of Mattituck, who lost her daughter Kaitlyn when she was hit by a car while away at college, decided she wanted to organize an event. To that end, she organized a raffle, "Crystals for A Cause — Benefitting Trisha Poole" which is taking place now online; winners will be drawn on October 26 at 7 p.m. at Harvest Pointe in Cutchogue; participants can watch via Zoom.

Doorhy and Kathy Liguori of Cutchogue organized the raffle ticket sale to win "bundles of bling", including pieces of Touchstone of Swarovski jewelry.

All of the proceeds will benefit Poole, Doorhy said. Poole, she added, is a "Mattituck resident who gives her heart and soul to her family and the community. A mom, wife, aunt, a friend battling breast cancer. We chose her because she is an amazing individual with a huge heart who is dealing with a huge setback. Together we can assist her to lift her spirits to get over this hurdle she is facing and beat the odds."

But the chain of love continued: Poole said she will not keep the proceeds, but instead, wants to donate them to her former sorority sister's oncologist, to be used for the critical, life-saving research Stromski has been such a staunch advocate for.

Poole, 45, a licensed massage therapist with Stony Brook Southampton Hospital, lives in Mattituck with her husband Gerard, who is the superintendent of the Shoreham-Wading River School District; the couple shares two boys, 21 and 19.

In January, she found a hard, pea-sized lump during a self-exam. She made an appointment to see her ob-gyn. "She did the exam and said, 'You need to have this looked at right away,'" Poole said.

Poole's mother had been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer in the past and just a few weeks ago, hit the five-year mark at which a person is considered cancer free and in remission. "You can breathe after those five years," Poole said.

Even when she was told she could go to Memorial Sloan-Kettering for a consultation, Poole said the reality didn't set in, at first. "It honestly really didn't even hit me, until a month ago when I was going through radiation," Poole said.

Poole was told that she needed to see a breast specialist on February 12. "On Thursday, I called Memorial Sloan Kettering and it just so happened they had a cancellation on Friday. Valentine's Day," she said. "So that was our date. And we never really do anything on Valentine's Day. That was the first time we were doing something together on Valentine's Day — we'll never forget it," she laughed.

Telling her story, Poole is able to laugh, to remain upbeat. And it's that trademark positivity, as well as a deep and abiding faith, that she said have carried her through. Lifted her up through that mammogram and ultrasound, when a radiologist came and she knew that she'd be facing one of the greatest challenges of her life.

Throughout the first weeks, it was the thought of her college friend Keri — knowing what she has faced, while still teaching kindergarten full-time and caring for her husband and three children — that kept her spirits buoyed, Poole said.

"Knowing all that Keri has gone through, and her strength — that was really what got me, and my husband through those first weeks. Knowing Keri, and knowing how strong she is, my husband said he knew this journey was going to be hard, but he was also able to have hope, because of Keri. I looked to Keri, and to her inspiration, and knew I was going to be okay," Poole said. "She has a really strong faith and I do, too."

Next came the months of chemotherapy, followed by surgery, and then, 25 rounds of radiation, which began on August 25 and ended this week.

From the first diagnosis, Poole said she's been determined. "I said, 'Okay, I'm onboard with whatever you want me to do, whatever you need me to do, whatever I need to do,'" she said. "Attitude, positivity, and hope are such a huge part of all of this. It really, truly does make a difference," Poole said. "That, and prayer. I really feel God is helping me to get through this. And I believe it's because of God that there are people like Keri."

Poole has found God's presence in the fact that there was a cancellation at Sloan Kettering when she needed one, and also, that she was able to have the same oncologist and surgeon who helped her mother.

When Doorhy contacted Poole, she was touched, she said. "It really means a lot that someone wants to do something to help," Poole said. "But I also felt really strongly that I didn't want the proceeds to go to me, directly. It was so important to me that any proceeds raised go to research — and to research that will help Keri, my friend, my sorority sister. Somebody who, from Day 1, helped me and my husband through this."

She and Keri talk often, Poole said. "We say, 'Oh, my gosh, who would have thought years ago that when we were in the sorority that now, we would have reconnected and be going through this?"

Poole watches Stromski's TikTok videos, sees her friend dancing at chemo, and laughing, even on the most difficult of days. She laughs, too, and finds hope in her friend's eyes and bright smile.

Now, after radiation, Poole has a few weeks before she begins a regime of Xeloda, an oral form of chemotherapy, for six months.

Despite her cheery disposition and ready laughter, Poole acknowledges that the journey has been not been easy. "I have days where I think, 'It's so hard,' and I just want to cry," she said. For a long time, she said, she just knew she had to keep moving forward. "You put your head in the sand and you just push through and you try not to think about things too much. I stay out of my head because if I get into my head and stay there for too long, it's not good."

Other days, she said, she finds her way forward with humor. "There were days, especially when I was going through chemotherapy, when I felt horrible and I wanted to lie in bed all day. Then I would see one of Keri's Facebook posts that made me laugh, and I'd ask myself, 'What would Keri do?' And I knew it sure as hell wouldn't be lying in bed."

So, even though she was exhausted and did take naps, she would make sure she didn't spend all day in bed, Poole said. "I would drag myself out of bed and I would pray. I would pull myself together and keep busy cooking something, or doing normal things around the house."

Being slammed with a breast cancer diagnosis days before the coronavirus lockdown was another daunting challenge, Poole said.

"The hardest part of going through this during the pandemic was not being able to see people," she said. "I'm really close to my family. Not being able to hug my family was really hard. Not being able to see friends, not seeing family, it was hard."

Now, feeling the love of friends coming together to help, Poole said: "We're all really lucky to live in this community because everybody is so willing to help other people. It's huge. It just makes me feel good."

And donating the money back for research, Poole said, means everything to her. "It's not just that it's research, it's research for Keri's oncologist. This research will directly benefit Keri and Keri is so important to me and has been so important to me, such an inspiration to me. She really helped my husband and I get through this. Even though I've told her several times, I don't know if she'll every really know how much she's helped, not just me, but him, too. She is an inspiration of hope, of strength — and her faith is huge."

To be able to help Dr. Stopeck and others, too, through the research, Poole said, "is a win, win, win. I'm the kind of person, I don't like the attention on me. I like to help other people."

Speaking of her longtime friend, Stromski said: "I've known Trish since we were in the Phi Sigma Sigma sorority at SUNY Cortland. We reconnected a few years ago and I was thrilled to find out she married Jerry, who I also knew for years. She became a light for me and was so supportive during the past four years."

She was shocked, Stromski said, when Poole called her right after COVID started and told her the news.

"But she said also that because I had been so open and honest, she wasn't as scared. I've been on 11 different types of chemotherapy and was able to give her tips. I shared wigs, and we also shared laughs," Stromski said. "She truly is one of the most giving, brave, loving, kind people I know."

Large cancer organizations focus on awareness, but funding is critically needed for research, Stromksi said. "I think by now that everyone is well aware that mammograms find cancer — but mammograms don't cure cancer. Research is what is needed to someday find a cure for Stage 4, the only stage that kills. Instead of buying pink shirts or boas or car magnets, I wish people would instead donate directly to research, 100 percent."

METAvivor is a national organization that does that, Stromski said, adding that she also supports the North Fork Breast Health Coalition because they give grants directly to local women to help with the costs associated with cancer.

"I found out last year that my oncologist has a research fund and we raised $11,000 last October through a taco truck fundraiser with Lucharitos, a spaghetti dinner at Jeni's in Southold that Trish helped with, and a GoFundMe campaign. $11,000 right to research. Amazing. Now?Trish is making a real difference and donating directly to a researcher with this fundraiser, as well. Dr. Stopeck is brilliant, and is always looking to find ways to help those affected by breast cancer. I'm so blessed that all of those years ago a decision to start a sorority has years later brought about a donation to help save lives. God bless Trish."

To participate in the raffle, Venmo @kathy-liguori or @darladoorhy in advance. The goal is to sell as many tickets as possible before October 15 at 7 p.m. when the winners will be drawn.

Those who refer/bring a friend to join the raffle will be entered to win an extra piece of "sparkle", Doorhy and Liguori said.

To participate in the online "Crystals for a Cause" raffle, click here.

To donate to Dr. Stopeck's fund directly, click here. Click "change" and enter "Alison Stopeck Research Fund." Then enter gift amount and click "Add to cart." For mail in donations, click here. Or mail checks directly to: Terri L. Quinn, Director of Special Events and Cause Marketing, Stony Brook Cancer Center, Lauterbur Dr.Hospital Pavilion, L5, RM 5W-511, Stony Brook, NY 11794-7263.