Bigbucks Dreams At Starbucks

In about a week Prospect Heights will no longer be Starbucks-free.
                --Prospect Heights Patch

Where now to find a Starbucks-free zone?

To see this El Dorado on my own

I jumped on a speedy rocket-fueled trolley

 Headed for points Midwest, and by golly

 Landed in Chicago and looked around--

No sign of such was to be found.

So on I plugged to old Cincinnati

In search of folks not coffee-batty.

Again the same, as it was in Milwaukee,

Where the locals don't drink but sure are talky.

 And so it went out West and South

 Unearthing no strangers-to-caffeine mouth.

The whole country, if my eyes don't deceive,

Is coffee-palace-crazed, I believe.

Medical repercussions, I leave to others,

Concerned doctors and worried mothers;

But consider, for the screenwriter caucus

The Starbucks tables supply an office

Where bigbucks dreamers can type and get high

 On just a single cup of chai.