The Holiday Downhill Plunge

Perched at the top of December, it’s time to catch our collective breath as we sit on the verge of another holiday downhill plunge toward overindulgence.

Overindulgence in just about every form it can take. Glitz, glam, whim, wham, bam…hold on tight, we're gonna get slammed!

After all...it’s the most magical time of the year…at least according to Andy.

We’re already a bit behind…or at least I am.

Some of the neighbors have already strung up their lights and decorations…in
fact, some were already up and waiting to be lit, well before Thanksgiving.

Black Friday has come and gone…as well as Small Business Saturday, Rip-off
Sunday, Cyber Monday and Toothless Tuesday. I’m not sure if 2 of the last 3 are
real, since I made them up, but they should be real. They make as much sense as
any of the others.

So holiday shopping is well underway, if not already done in some cases. The
holiday invites are in your mailbox. Santa’s made his list and checked it more
than twice.

As for me…I’m still mowing my lawn and picking up the stray leaf or two. If
this recent warm weather keeps up, I may have to wander over to the beach and
count all the sugarplums dancing in my head…which I find annoying.

Don’t get me wrong; it’s not that I’m some kind of a Grinch or a Scrooge. I
do enjoy this time of year and all the accompanying hub-bub. It’s just that it
always feels like it’s being shoved down our throats, from Columbus Day on.

If you buy into all the pre-mature hoopla, you’re sick of the holidays before they
even get started. If you don’t buy in, you resist for so long that by the time
you do jump on board, it feels as if you missed the party.

But again, I realize I could be talking just for myself here, and the rest of you are scratching your head saying...“Huh?????”

I get that a lot…

In the next day or so, I’ll start dragging out the myriad of lights we throw
up on our house every year. We do a simple but classic look for the house. I
think there are about 27 thousand little white lights involved. You should see
my electric meter spin. It actually creates a huge breeze in my basement.

No, I’m kidding…it’s just a small breeze.

But it a pretty basic set up of my wife, Z’s, design. Candles illuminate
every window, along with lights that accentuate the small garden bushes, plus
the larger bush we call Sponge Bob by the front door. There are also wreaths
and bows on all the windows and our large stone chimney, with a small lighted
polar bear prowling off to the side for balance.

It must look nice, cuz I have often caught regular folks snapping pictures of
it.

The irregular folks just snap their fingers and roll around on the lawn, but
I don’t think that has anything to do with the decorations.

So Z seems to know what she’s doing.

But the execution of the design falls to me, which I sometimes take too literally. See, I need to climb a very high ladder to place the wreath on the chimney and every now and then I forget that it’s not a smart idea to step back and admire my work.

Nope...not a smart idea at all….

But all in all, it always turns out nice, and I usually heal in time for the rest of the holiday hub-bub.

And before we know it…we’ll be taking it all down.

That much closer to spring….

From The Freelance Retort

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