Parents: Make sure your child is a sparkling party 'guest'

It seems to me that appropriate manners as a party guest have gotten lost among the gift-wrap and ribbons.  A child who has been invited to a party should understand that it is an honor to have been included on the guest list; therefore, she/he should not take lightly the honor of being a guest and what that truly means. This is not old-fashioned advice but common sense, relevant advice that reminds us to teach our children how to be sparkling party guests:

1)  RSVP (French phrase 'respondez, s'il vous plait' means to reply) to an invitation as soon as possible.    If the reply is 'yes,' unless your child is sick, then parents must see to it the child attends.  It is simple courtesy to the host of the party who is planning food, space, etc.

2)  Be on time.  And, please don't be more than five to ten minutes early.  The host has taken care to plan festivities for the length of time allowed. Call, if you will be more than ten minutes late.  Also, plan to stay the entire length of the party.  

3)  Never bring a friend or sibling to the party unless the host has been made aware of with plenty of time in advance.

4)  Be clean and dressed appropriately.  A guest should not stand-out as either under-dressed or over-dressed.

5)  Arrive with gift in hand.  Gift cards have become popular and acceptable, but it's obvious that not much time or thought have been spent!  Birthday gifts don't have to be expensive, nor should they put a strain on the family to buy.  Something home-made that you know the birthday girl/boy would love to have is sufficient.  

6)  Respect the host's home and belongings.  Care should be taken to keep furnishings and floors clean, items unbroken, toilets unclogged, etc.  Throwing things, touching electronics without permission, snooping, aggravating the pets, etc are ill-mannered. The same holds true for any location.

7)  Join in on the fun.  A sparkling guest makes sure to speak with everyone and participates in the activities that are planned.  Being shy is no excuse for unfriendliness or inattentiveness.  Sharing and getting along with everyone are basic social skills when in a group.

8)  Thank the guest of honor and hosts before leaving for the invitation and for the good time that was enjoyed. 

Parents, I would like to add that you should arrive at the door with your child and make sure you meet the hosts.  Plan to stay unless your conversation with the hosts leads you to believe that it's okay to leave during the party.  If leaving, give a phone number in case you need to be reached.  Please return on time to personally pick-up your child and to also offer thanks. 

As parents, we want to hear how kind and well-mannered our children are in the  presence of others.  When we teach and model how to be a sparkling guest, then our children won't disappoint.  When they know what is expected of them, they normally want to please you.  Using these tips, be prepared for the compliments you and your child will receive! 

Be looking for future advice that helps youth today navigate just about any social situation.  For information on how your child can grow into a gracious and socially intelligent young member of society, contact Upstate School of Etiquette, Easley. 864-859-6407.  Visit www.upstateschoolofetiquette.com. Ronda Ellison, Director