Are Young Girls Dressing Too Sexy?

If you’re ever looking to vent, catch up on the latest gossip – I mean news – or just get out of the house for some friendly mom chats and can’t get to a wine tasting any time soon, head straight over to the soccer field.

In the one hour it takes for your children to boot the ball around the field, you will quickly get up to speed on important stuff like whose kid has had recess detention, who the newly divorced orthodontist is dating and where the Joneses are going to vacation this summer once they cash in their inheritance bonds. You’ll also have lots of laughs, release some stress, oh, and quite possibly get an eyeful of the latest fashion trends—or lack thereof.

Recently a group of us were sharing in all that soccer mom fun when we couldn’t help but notice a few girls, probably about nine or 10 years old, hanging out at the playground.  It was a cool, misty morning, but these young girls were wearing outfits you’d see on a prostitute in training on a blazing, hot August day. Daisy Duke shorts cut to the South of France, T-shirts that were squeezing every bump and roll they had right out of the mesh fabric and strappy sandals that one of Hugh Hefner’s playmates probably posed in last month. It wasn’t pretty.

This opened the floodgates of discussion about whether or not it seemed to be a growing trend that younger girls are dressing too sexy and what, if anything, could be done about it.

The majority of our moms taking on this hot topic all have daughters ranging in ages from five to 20. Not one enjoys shopping with them for clothing and that is largely due to the styles that are being carried in many of the area stores as well as online. 

One challenge parents are facing is that, even when we do make what we feel are appropriate choices in clothing for our kids, they are still exposed to their peer group wearing “hoochy mama” styles in and outside of the classroom. 

Take for instance the recent outrage when Abercrombie & Fitch recently introduced the "push-up triangle" bathing suit top for girls as young as the age of seven. A report on Fox News said that parents are already up in arms about the sexualization of teens but now this trend is trickling down to our babies.

Parenting expert Dr. Janet Rose told Fox News, “If we continue to try to make our children value 'sexy,' I shudder to think what damage we are doing to their future self-concepts and adult values. In the long run, I fear we are creating girls who will suffer from low self-esteem, eating disorders, depression and all the issues that go along with that.”

In addition, many parents are upset about a new Skechers commercial advertising “Shape Ups” for girls. The sneaker, first marketed to adults, is supposed to help tone backsides and thighs.Now, Skechers apparently thinks little girls could use Shape Ups, too. The animated commercial, airing on children's TV networks, features a young seemingly popular girl named Heidi wearing Shape Ups. Heidi sings "She's got the height, got the bounce, yeah she's looking good and having fun because she’s got new Shape Ups." Just one more example of how commercialism is playing a big role in influencing their choices.

Mix in the temptation of the hottest dolls in the toy aisle, Bratz with overblown lips, smoky eyes and hot pants, again, young girls are being sent a message that implies "this is how you should look."

Would you believe that a book has actually been written on this subject?  Celia Rivenbark, a mom who hit her breaking point with the shrinking fashions, wrote a book called, "Stop Dressing Your Six Year Old Like a Skank."

"The moms are buying it, the dads are buying and maybe on some level the parents think, 'Oh that's cute, that's harmless, that's innocent' – but I don't think it is," Rivenbark said. "The children are wearing them down and they end up giving in and buying them napkins for pants and ace bandages for shirts!"

Here are some strategies discussed on how we can help keep our young girls looking age appropriate and dare we say, wholesome, until--oh, say they’re 30!

• Plan Ahead   This may sound easier than done but when shopping for clothes for your young daughter talk about the items needed and what would look great on her before you actually get to the store. If this means going through her drawers and closet, make the time so that you are prepared mentally (and financially!) for what she is looking to shop for. If she’s in need of new shorts for summer, talk about what colors she would like and plant the seed now that some shorts will be great for wearing around the backyard or over a bathing suit while other styles will work best for school. We can’t forget, also, that many of these sensual styles look good on only a small handful of girls that don’t have an ounce of body fat on their frames.  Girls that are plus size or even just more developed than others in their age group definitely give these skimpy styles a whole new look.

• Compromise   Your kids might have a preference as to where they shop (sometimes based solely on peer pressure) so discuss in advance what stores you are agreeable to take them to. Young girls don’t have to wear seersucker smocks and high-necked blouses to look respectable. You can get a good idea of what’s available and is currently on trend by looking online before you hit the mall.  If you have concerns about some of the styles you think your daughter is going to demand she have, this will give you some advanced notice of what you are up against.  If she’s got to have the latest trend in T-shirts, you can certainly discourage any that are stamped across the chest with words like “juicy” or “hot to the touch.”

• Draw the Line   It’s one thing when a 16-year-old girl goes shopping and comes home with skinny jeans and a pair of high heels – well, not really! –  but when you see a seven-year-old wearing something similar, there had to be an adult along for the ride when that outfit was purchased.  Parents need to draw the line when it comes to purchasing these sultry outfits for their innocent babies. It doesn’t matter if she pleads that her entire classroom dresses like this. She’s your daughter, you can say “well you don’t.”

• School Uniforms? The debate on whether or not public schools should require students to wear uniforms is beginning to heat up in many school districts across the country.  Many parents are questioning if this might help squelch inappropriate clothing for both girls and boys.  Our Parents’ Council will be tackling this question in the near future.

Do you feel young girls' are pushing the envelope with their choice of clothing?  How are you handling this situation in your own household? We’d love to hear it here in the comments section. Also, if you’re interested in joining our NK Parents’ Council or have a question you’d like us to tackle, please email me at CB091987@aol.com or e-mail our editor, Samantha Turner at Samantha.Turner@patch.com.