Domestic Violence—is it personal?

So you don’t think you are affected by domestic violence? Think again!  

Mary and her husband live in a middle class neighborhood.  Usually, her husband John is able to keep his abuse very silent, however his job has been extremely challenging because of deadlines, and the pressure is causing him to behave even more abusively.

The escalation of the noise and screaming causes concerned neighbors to call the police.  This happens three times within a month. The police calls have to be reported as violent incidents causing the middle class neighborhood to go down in value.  Now you try to sell your home, however you are told due to the value of the neighborhood—you will lose money.

 Domestic Violence—is it personal yet?   Dave is an abusive husband.  He comes home, gets drunk and is soon on a tirade, causing everyone in the house to be afraid.  His 9-year-old son, Jack, sees this anger and experiences fear daily.  Outwardly he appears OK until he goes to school.  Because Jack rarely gets a good night's sleep and meals are often interrupted—Jack goes to school unable to focus, irritable and disruptive.  Your son goes to school with Jack and the teacher is never able to get through a full class because she constantly has to stop  to attend to Jack and his disruptions.

Your son is doing pretty well except in his math class—where he shares a class with Jack. Your son is so distracted by Jack, and the constant acting out that he ends up failing math. Domestic Violence- Is it personal yet?  

 Nancy is a great worker—sometimes—when she comes to work, that is. Twice a week, Nancy misses work. She has confided in you that her husband is abusive to her and that some mornings she is just too sore to get up and come to work or, she is extremely tired because he has kept her up all night long with yelling, lectures and beatings.  You try to be understanding, but when she misses work it pulls you from your job and you end up having to do her work. 

You end up having to work later and longer hours. When you get home you are tired and drained and you seldom get a chance to spend quality time with your kids.  You have talked to your boss, however, they have told you  if they let Nancy go then they most likely won’t be able to hire someone else, so then you will be stuck doing all of her work. You are pretty much stuck between a rock and hard place ... Domestic Violence-is it personal yet?  

 It’s right before open enrollment on the job.  Your insurance provider tells you that your company spent $30,000 more in medical bills this year than the previous.  As it turns out, a couple of your employees are in abusive relationships and have had an enormous amount of ER and urgent care visits.  As a result everyone’s deductions will have to double! Domestic Violence-is it personal yet?

This list could go on and on … Domestic violence effects EVERYONE in one way or another! So now that it's personal- what are you going to do about it? Email us at Infoaboutabuse@gmail.com to find out more about how you can help fight domestic violence.