Losing a Son to Drugs

By Jack Briggs

Nothing prepared me for the loss of my son.

Nothing.

When you have to bury your child, nothing in your DNA has prepared you for the shock of their death; the things you have to do to bury them or the grief afterward.

Nothing.

With their passing, you lose their future and the future you would have shared with them.

It’s a kick in the gut that never loosens up. As the days and months go by (and I am told the years) you have periods of “normalcy,” but then something triggers a thought about your child and your gut is once again turned upside down.

I know, because my 21-year-old son, Kevin, died from a drug overdose. There isn’t a day I don’t think of and miss him.

My son’s death came on Sept. 12, 2014. My wife and I knew he was using drugs, first weed and then opiates, but we were not aware of just how bad things had gotten until his death. We found him on the floor of his apartment, shirtless, face down with his knees buckled up against his chest.

My creative, energetic, life-loving son suffered from the disease of drug addiction. At the time of his death, he was working as a car salesman, six days a week, 12 hours a day. He looked and dressed well and was trying to find his way in life.

I would like to think we could start to do something for those young people (and their families) who are either thinking about giving into the pressure of starting drugs or are wrestling with the demons associated with drug use. These people need help and understanding.

For whatever reason, the number of people, of all races, sexes, economic and regional backgrounds, trying opiates and heroin is increasing. It is a nationwide epidemic. As the price of pain pills has gone up, the street cost of heroin has gone down. Naive, thrill-seeking, experimenting young people are turning to it for a quick high.

My wife and I have been blown away by the number of people we’ve met who have gone through a similar experience as our family. And far too many feel shame, embarrassment or disgust. They should not.

Parents need to be educated of and accepting of the problem. Only then can they realistically try and deal with the issues that drug abuse brings within a home. It is not easy. My wife and I spent six years trying to get our son away from the so-called “drug sub-culture.” We both saw some positive change in the last months of Kevin’s life, but obviously not enough.

The last words I said to my son on the night he died were, “I love ya buddy.” He and I had just had dinner, and my wife and I were scheduled to leave the next day for Italy.

My only regret is I didn’t tell him I wasn’t ashamed of him. I wasn’t then and am not now. He was a good kid and young man burdened with the disease of addiction.

We have to all understand and accept that it is a disease, that has to be treated as such, and that any stigma associated with it should be eliminated.

Jack Briggs, a Fairfax resident for 37 years, works for the Associated Press as a sports broadcaster. The loss of his son Kevin to heroin is devastating to him but does not diminish how he feels about Kevin. Jack and his wife Kathy are working with the Unified Prevention Coalition as well as Fairfax County in trying to find ways to help those who suffer from drug abuse, not just the user but their family. Kathy Briggs will take part in the April 13 “Painkillers & Heroin: Our Community Problem” forum.

The Unified Prevention Coalition of Fairfax County is a nonprofit organization with more than 60 community partners working together to keep youth and young adults safe and drug-free. Visit www.unifiedpreventioncoalition.org and www.facebook.com/unifiedpreventioncoalition. Follow the group on Twitter at www.twitter.com/keepyouthsafe.

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“Painkillers & Heroin: Our Community Problem” will be held Monday, April 13 from 7-9 p.m. at the Fairfax County Public Schools’ Gatehouse Administration Center (First Floor Café), located at 8115 Gatehouse Road, Falls Church, VA 22042. Virginia Secretary of Health and Human Services William A. Hazel Jr., M.D., will be the keynote speaker. The program is presented by the Unified Prevention Coalition of Fairfax County and the Fairfax County Neighborhood and Community Services. The event is free, but registration is requested at www.unifiedpreventioncoalition.org.