Girls Gone Wild for a Place to Sleep, Some Tacos and a Guy's Car: OMGPD

By Dennis Robaugh

OMGPD: weird and noteworthy crime posts on the #PatchChicago network.

Hello, I’m Not Home: A drunken young woman tore through a window screen and climbed into her neighbor’s bedroom. The next morning, the neighbor found the damage and a purse, which led Elmhurst cops straight to the blonde, 23-year-old culprit. She told police she was drunk and thought she was breaking into her own house. “Stuff happens,” she seems to be saying in her impish booking-mug grin. » via Elmhurst Patch

Taco Hell: A very hungry daughter tracked down her father at the park, smacked her dad’s girlfriend in the face and sprayed her with Mace when Dad wouldn’t hand over cash for her regular Sunday tacos, according to police. Sadly, tacos aren’t served in jail. » via Joliet Patch

With a Friend Like This: A 22-year-old woman asked a friend to drive her home just to set him up for a carjacking and a punch to the back of the head, according to Joliet police, who found his car when a teen-aged girl attempted to sell the hot wheels. The bad friend, Jessica Islas, was taken into custody Wednesday. » via Joliet Patch

This is No Game: Whiteboy7thSt., a YouTube celeb with 2.5 million followers of his online-gamer videos, was victimized by “swatting” in Plainfield when someone lied and told cops he was suicidal and threatening to shoot his girlfriend. When cops arrived in force and surrounded his house, they found a stunned Alexander Wachs, 24. And some pot. No gun, no threats, no suicide. Just pot, video games and perpetual childhood. The cops charged Wachs, but the state’s attorney’s office dropped the charges. » via Plainfield Patch

Sin and Juice: Someone broke into the Truth in God Church in Joliet and drank the Lord’s communion juice. The next day, someone broke in through a window. Nothing was taken, and no communion juice was imbibed. » via Joliet Patch

The Gas Man: A 37-year-old man carrying a siphon and a gas can was spotted in an Elmhurst industrial park by police. When they caught up with him, they discovered he’d sucked five gallons of fuel from vehicles in the area. They arrested him — and towed away his Mercedes Benz. » via Elmhurst Patch

Love in the Time of Alcohol: A 27-year-old imbibing dude thought he was being “flirty” with a female bar employee when he punched her in the arm at a bar called the Snuggery, police said. But she called the cops, and now he’s charged with battery. So much for the advice in the “Ray Rice Guide to Picking Up Chicks.” » via Elmhurst Patch

Hands in the Air ... Conditioner: A Lake Bluff resident unable to turn off his air conditioner called police. When police arrived, officers ordered the air conditioner to stop but it kept running ... so they shot it in the back. (Actually, the helpful officer turned off the air conditioner and told the homeowner to call a repairman.) » via Lake Forest Patch

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