To serve, honor, protect...and laugh

My memories of the four years I served as an Army officer (after attending college on a ROTC scholarship and receiving my commission via that route) are abundant and generally, fond. They include: going to Airborne school and parachuting, 5 times, out of a perfectly good airplane; leading 150 soldiers (many of whom were older and crustier than me) in my first job as a platoon/section leader in Bad Kreuznach, Germany; firing both an M-16 and M-60; acquiring a top-secret security clearance; and working as a protocol officer with several heady VIP encounters.  But what really stands out the most for me from those years was the shared camaraderie and prolific laughter. 

I am not sure if I just happened to luck out by getting stationed with incredibly funny people or if it was the challenges of the profession that bred such irreverent and often, gallows humor.  I am guessing it was a little bit of both.  For sure, it’s one of the few vocations where you are thrown into adversarial situations and strenuous deployments with minimal creature comforts.  Unless you're in the Air Force, of course.  Just kidding.  Sleep and caffeine deprivation, one decent meal a day, and limited opportunities to bathe can bring to the surface many things in people, to include, a warped and oftentimes, ribald sense-of-humor. 

In fact, the military has long been an environment that fosters notable words, acronyms or expressions that frequently lean on the (euphemism alert) “creative” side in terms of not adhering to society’s rules of political correctedness.  Many of the expressions that originated in the military have found their way into today’s vernacular but there are still plenty that are unique to just the armed forces.  I have compiled a list (and done my best to keep it PG-rated!) of some of the more common slang, phrases or acronyms that get tossed around on a fairly regular basis.

B.C.D.-pronounced phonetically; short for “birth-control device” and describes anything government- issued, like eyeglasses, which are unattractive enough to keep away members of the opposite sex 

B.D.U.-pronounced phonetically; short for “battle-dress uniform” which are camouflage fatigues

Brat-word used to describe children of service members; also called military brats

BOHICA-bo is pronounced like bow and arrows, followed by he-kuh; short for “Bend over, here it comes again”

Butterbar-2^nd Lieutenant or ensign which is the lowest officer rank; the insignia of the rank is a single gold bar; senior enlisted often use this term when discussing a newbie junior officer

CF-pronounced Charlie Foxtrot (military alphabet for C and F); short for “cluster [expletive]” and describes a disastrous situation that results from errors of several people or groups

CONUS-pronounced cone-us; short for “Continental United States”; describes a duty station or place of deployment

Dependent/family member-word used to describe persons in a family that a service member financially supports

Deuce and a half- 2 ½ ton truck that is used for hauling cargo or up to 40 people; common vehicle in convoys (group of military vehicles that travel together in formation)

FIDO-pronounced like the dog’s name; short for “[expletive] it and drive on”

FIGMO-pronounced like the fruit plus the name of the one Stooge; short for “[expletive] it, I got my orders” and is generally uttered when one is a short-timer (close to moving to a new duty station or leaving the military) or has a bad attitude

Fruit salad-slang term used to describe the appearance of many medals on someone’s dress uniform

F.T.A.-pronounced phonetically; with Marines, it means “failure to adjust” and describes someone who can’t make it through training/boot camp; in the Army, it means “[expletive] the Army” and is uttered out of frustration or resignation

FUBAR-pronounced like Foo (Fighters) + bar; short for "[expletive] up beyond all recognition” or “...beyond all repair”; used when something is a total disaster

G.I.-pronounced phonetically; slang for a soldier but also stands for “Government- Issue”

High speed, low drag- expression used when something is regarded as excellent; especially when describing military equipment

Hooah, hoo-rah or hoo-yah- a spirited exclamation that is yelled out to indicate motivation, being fired up or agreement/affirmation

Hudson High-derogatory reference to West Point; Hudson refers to the Hudson River which the U.S. Military Academy is situated upon in upstate NY.

Jodie/Jody-refers to someone who steals the significant other of a service member when they are deployed; also songs that are sung to keep cadence during marching/running in formation are called “jodies”.

K.P.-pronounced phonetically; short for “kitchen patrol”; used when someone has to pull K.P. duty

L.T.-pronounced phonetically; short for “lieutenant”

M.R.E.-pronounced phonetically; short for “Meals-Ready-to-Eat” which are pre-packaged meals that are eaten in the field (term used to describe a training exercise) or during deployments; jokingly referred to as “Meals Rejected by Ethiopians” or “Meals Rejected by the Enemy” too

OCONUS-pronounced oh-conus; short for “outside continental United States”; describes a duty station or place of deployment

P.C.S.-pronounced phonetically; short for “Permanent Change of Station”; describes a relocation to a new duty station

REMF-short for “Rear Echelon Mother-[expletive]”; pejorative term used by front-liners towards those who hold cushier jobs in the rear area

Ring-knocker-derisive term for an officer who graduated from a military academy; refers to the class rings that many of these graduates favor

R.N.R. or R&R-pronounced phonetically; short for “Rest and Relaxation”; often used by service members to describe their vacation

Rock-and-roll-refers to the fully automatic fire setting on a weapon; there are three settings:  safe, semi-automatic and automatic (or rock-and-roll)

S&E-pronounced phonetically; short for “Salute and Execute”; generally refers to following an order that is rendered by a higher ranking officer that is being done reluctantly or with minimal enthusiasm

SH-pronounced Sierra Hotel (military alphabet for S and H), short for “[expletive] hot”; means very impressive or the highest praise

Snafu-short for “Situation Normal, All [expletive] Up”; generally used when discussing a setback to mission accomplishment

S.O.S.-pronounced phonetically, short for “[expletive] on a shingle” and describes chipped beef on toast which is commonly found in military mess halls (cafeterias).

Squared-away-means you have things in order; also used to describe someone who looks sharp during a military inspection

Stack arms-refers to placing weapons into a circle with all of the tips leaning against each other so they stand upright by balancing against each other; slang for describing someone who quits or who is taking a rest

Stand tall-describes a proud military bearing; used as a verb

T.D.Y.-pronounced phonetically; short for “temporary duty”; the military’s version of a business trip

TM-pronounced Tango Mike (military alphabet for T and M); short for “thanks much”

TU-pronounced Tango Uniform (military alphabet for T and U); short for “[slang for female body part] up”; describes a failed mission

WTF-pronounced Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (military alphabet for W, T and F); short for “what the [expletive]”; used long before the mainstream usage of today in texts, etc.

Military members take immense pride in proclaiming the superiority of their branch of service over rival branches.  And great sport is taken in ridiculing the other branches.  The following mocking acronyms/words are some I have heard over the years:

A.R.M.Y.-short for “Air Force Rejected Me Yesterday” or “Aren’t Ready to Be Marines Yet”

Chairforce-word used to describe Air Force personnel who aren’t pilots and who spend their time “flying a desk”

M.A.R.I.N.E.-short for “Muscles Are Required, Intelligence Not Essential” or “My [expletive] Rides in Navy Equipment”

N.A.V.Y.-short for “Never Again Volunteer Yourself” or “Need Any Vaseline Yet?”

U.S.C.G.-abbreviation for United States Coast Guard or slang for “Uncle Sam’s Confused Group”

U.S.M.C.-abbreviation for United States Marine Corps or slang for “U Suckers Missed Christmas” or “Uncle Sam’s Misguided Children”

Certainly, the list goes on and on.  And considering how many years and military engagements have clicked off since the time I served, I can only imagine how many new phrases and acronyms have come into play.  We have a huge population of armed forces personnel…Active Duty, Reserve, National Guard, retired, family members…in the greater metropolitan Washington area.  It'd be great to hear from some of you. Please share with Patch readers anything I've missed or some of your own favorite military memories, phrases or jargon…